Thinking of moving in together? Consider these points before taking the plunge.
1. The question of why.
One of the key things to think about before moving in together is the question of why. Make sure it is 100% clear to the both of you what your intentions are, to avoid confusion about each other’s motives when moving in together. Are you making this decision to save money for things such as rent? To boost the status of your relationship? Marriage preparation? Or even to make a long distance relationship easier for the both of you? Make sure the other person knows exactly why you want to move in together and vice versa.
2. Handling situations as a team.
Remembering sticky situations in the past as a couple can be tough. Could you figure these situations out without taking it out on each other? Are you able to work things out as a team? Living with your partner will expose you to many more of these sticky situations and it becomes a question of your ability to handle these situations as a team. This can majorly impact the decision of moving in together or not.
3. The Scale of your arguments and sorting things out
Compromising with each other now and then dissolves disagreements and any conflict between the two of you. According to Dr. Stan Tatkin, “couples therapist and author of Wired for Dating and Wired for Love', he states that "Partners that are orientated in such a way that they are too non-collaborative, too unfair, too unjust, and too insensitive, will find themselves increasingly unsafe and insecure in the relationship". If you are a couple that would be considered unstable, is such as huge step like moving in together going to impact your relationship in a positive way or a negative way?
4. The future
Have a think about what you both want in the future as a couple. Do you want to get married? Do you want to keep things as they are short term or indefinitely? Speak to each other about what you both want and if you’re on the same page, otherwise moving in together may not be the best decision after all.
In response to who will pay for what, author and certified financial planner Pam Friedman says that "It’s a good idea to start by defining expenses that are joint and those that are not. For example rent, food, and utilities may be joint but cell phones, haircuts and auto expense may not be. Budgeting can be complicated by factors like disparity in incomes. Should the higher paid person pay more of the joint expenses or should the couple live more frugally and divide joint expenses equally?" Financially as a couple, there needs to be agreements and compromises before moving in together.
Thinking of moving in with your partner? Or have a house to sell or let? For more information, please give us a call on 0121 445 3311 or drop into one of our local high street offices.